Reminiscence
by Sol Hiryu
Summary: OneShot After his encounter with Ken in the Emperor's base, TK takes the time to reevaluate himself, his friends, and his past demons. TK's POVRevised, continuity errors fixed


Edited Author's Notes: ARGH. I can't believe I just spotted a canon continuity error in here! That's what I get for not checking the Episode guides before hand...Oh well.

Anyway, revised and ready to read. Have fun.

**Reminiscence:**

I guess I haven't taken a good look at myself lately.

It started after I encountered the Digimon Emperor, Ken, inside his base in the Digital World. Cody and I were supposed to go in and free all the imprisoned Digimon within his base. That's when I saw 'him'.

Devimon.

That name is like a curse to me...It reminds me of memories I would rather forget. However, I can't forget, even if I tried. Yet, even with all the stuff that Devimon did back then, it pales in comparison to some of out later enemies...Enemies such as Myotismon, or Piedmon. When Angemon died when he fought with Devimon, that was the first time I saw death up close, and the pain I felt in my heart that day will never be forgotten.

Another Digimon, Puppetmon, gave me conflicting feelings...I hate him, yet I pity him at the same time. Even though he is long dead, I still can't help but feel a small bit of pity for him, he was a very lonely Digimon. He kidnapped me when we were walking through his territory, hoping to get an advantage over us. I was able to get away from him though, I used his own loneliness against him. I got lucky that time.

Unfortunately, my escape nearly tore the group apart, as I would later find out. My brother, Matt, was feeling so depressed that I didn't have to look to him for guidance anymore, went missing for nearly a day. When he came back, he did something no one expected. He challenged Tai for leadership of the Digidestined. During the battle, some kind of force entered Kari's body and showed us a vision of the past, causing the battle between Tai and Matt to end abruptly.

Matt soon left us afterwards, claiming that he needed time to himself.

Although I was young at that time, I wasn't stupid. We were trying to save both the Digital and Real worlds, and my brother went off by himself for reasons I still don't understand to this day. In a lot of ways, I still haven't forgiven my brother. He abandoned the group...no, he abandoned me. He said I could take care of myself from then on. I couldn't believe him, was he really abandoning the group just for that reason alone? Like I said before, I may not understand it now, but hopefully, I will in time.

I digress; I am getting away from the point. When I saw that Ken was going to use Devimon's power for his own sake, I lost it. I left Cody to his own devices and went off searching for him.

I found him not long afterwards. Although he tried to intimidate me, I just took it in stride and shot down his words. However, when he tried to claim he was the most powerful being in the entire Digital world, I couldn't help myself. I laughed. He attacked me afterwards, and we got into a brawl. It was soon interrupted by my friends attacking the base, and Ken escaped on his Airdramon.

Not long afterwards, I found myself here, sitting on the beach, one day after the Emperor's downfall. I left Patamon at home today; I needed some time to myself.

I began thinking of my new friends, how did things start ending up the way they did?

Yolei...She is an excitable sort. Once you get her going on something, she'll never stop until she goes all the way or it blows up in her face. She is the resident nerd of our group, but I use that term in respect, as Izzy was often called that. However, she does have a huge temper and a short fuse, with Davis lighting it most of the time. She also suffers from an inferiority complex about her siblings, as she is the youngest. However, she also tries her best to not let such things get the better of her though, she has a love for all things and sincere about everything...So much, it's painful sometimes.

Cody is a weird case. His father died some time ago when he was young, and I think that is what hit him the hardest. He has grown up quickly...Not height wise, of course, but maturity wise. He is rather serious with everything, but it's not surprising, considering that he practices Kendo. However, this seriousness is a flaw with him, he doesn't know when to lighten up or just relax, it usually takes coaxing from someone like Joe to do that. Yet, I can see why he got the DigiEggs of Knowledge and Reliability. You can rely on him as a friend, and he is quite smart and wise for someone so young.

Then there is Davis, the leader of the new Digidestined. At first, I felt a little resentment that he was chosen to be leader, but I found myself not caring the next morning. He certainly has the traits to be a leader...If only he could focus on it. He's a soccer freak, like Tai is/was, and he's a pretty good player, too. I would say his ego matches Tai's, they are both boastful. I think it's because of that is why we quarreled so often, especially during the MetalGreymon incident. Aside from that, he's a pretty happy-go-lucky kind of person, it's hard to bring him down about anything, excluding the fact when he found out that Ken was the Emperor. His obsession over Kari, though, is somewhat nerve grating, especially when he can't get my name right whenever Kari and I are together. I can see why he got the eggs of Courage and Friendship though. He isn't afraid to charge headfirst into danger to rescue people, and his friends are his lifeblood. I think I heard him say offhandedly one time that he would be nothing without us.

And Kari...She is like a sister I never had. I am tempted to say sibling, as Matt hasn't been so brotherly in the past, but I am willing to forgive him. Anyway, she is sweet, kind, gentle, and she always looks on the bright side of things...I can see why Davis is obsessed with her. She also has this mysterious power, something that Izzy can't understand. It was probably her power that drew her into the Dark Ocean, a horrifying experience for both her and me. I still can't understand how Gatomon digivolved in there, seeing as we all gave up our Crest powers to power the barrier of the Digital World. Too bad it didn't work.

However, I am getting away from the point again. How have I changed from all of these events? Have I really started to have a black and white view of the world?

I suppose I have. But, can you blame me? My friends and I have gone through many experiences with evil Digimon; most of them being dark, like Devimon.

I know precisely why I blew up at Ken after I saw Devimon again. He was trying to control the forces of darkness, trying to make his ultimate Digimon. I couldn't believe he had the gall to use power you have no control over, especially a power that is evil to the core...I was so angry at that time, I wasn't thinking rationally. It was like my anxieties from the past few days had caused my anger to just snap. I don't regret my actions in the base though, I did what I believed was right.

That's what it comes down to the end, right? What you believe in. Although us Digidestined have always believed what we were doing was right, what about some of the evil Digimon we faced? Were they doing what they thought was right? It may not have been justifiable, but were they acting on the beliefs?

This is starting to hurt my head...But enough about that.

I still haven't answered my own question, even after all this musing. How did I become the person I am today?

I am afraid of a lot of things, I must admit. Although the darkness is one of my biggest fears, I am also afraid of loving somebody, or somebody loving me.

I took my parent's divorce much harder than anyone thought. For years, I had the notion that love would eventually end up in a terrible break-up...Like with my parents. I have gotten over that stage, but I'm still afraid of loving somebody...I still have years of growing up to do though, I'm still an adolescent.

What keeps me going, though, through all the hard times? I guess it's my will to live. Despite all the dangerous stuff we have been doing in the Digital World as of late, I've put myself in danger more times then I can count. Yet, I'm am really afraid of dying. Everyone is, I suppose, but that doesn't stop me from being afraid.

I shouldn't think so gloomily. I have to look on the bright side of things, I have to keep the hope. I still have the hope from when we left the Digiworld 4 years ago...The hope that we would see our partners again.

My hope came true, thankfully, when we saw our partners again when we gave up our Crest powers. Lately, I realized I haven't fixated on a new hope. Maybe that is why I haven't felt as great as I should have been.

I have been perplexed on what I should hope to happen. I had hoped to bring the Emperor down myself after seeing him use the powers of darkness, but Davis beat me to it...Not that I blame him for it, somebody had to do it.

But what should my new hope be? We defeated the Emperor, and the Digital World is safe for now, but I'm still not reassured.

Suddenly, it came to me...what my new hope should stand for. Reminiscing like this has just given me my new hope...To make sure that Digimon everywhere are safe from evil everywhere. Although I realized it was a bit much to hope for something like that, I can already feel that this new hope will give me the strength to push myself ahead.

Well, it's getting late...I suppose that after all the events in the Digital World, it would make sense that I would be so exhausted, even a day afterwards. However, Ken's downfall has finally ensured peace for the Digiworld...For now, anyways.

I can't explain it...I'm getting some kind of foreboding feeling...In my experience, it usually means that there is usually something bigger out there, something more powerful and even worse than the previous evil...I just hope I'm wrong on this one, though.

Why do the forces of evil always have to be so persistent?

**End**

See? This is what happens when I set my mind on something and write. Took me just under an hour. Hope I got the characterization right...

I fixed the continuity errors and added some more to this fic. I'm trying to add some more to TK's character, but it's kind of hard...Especially when I have to try and imagine how someone is feeling during an event. I'm aiming to have him question his own actions and the actions of others, but I dunno if it is working out. Ah well.

Flames and Constructive Criticism accepted and encouraged.


End file.
